>Humiliation

>Last night the fam went out to celebrate. I got my TAKS results (state testing) and they were great. My daughter also made a 100 on her reading test! Pretty awesome 🙂

Plan was dinner and a movie, so we ate and went to see Rio. I was standing off to the side, wrapping up a cell conversation with my brother. A college girl, who had been behind us in line, spots me across the lobby and starts to smirk.
In my mind, I was thinking, “There is NO WAY that girl is looking at me. Quit over-reacting.” Before I could talk myself down, she had called two friends over, whispered to them, and then they ALL THREE TURNED AND LAUGHED.
Oh yeah. That happened.
I was completely stunned. I glared at them as hard as I could, and said goodbye to my brother, but I could feel my pulse start to race and face going red.
My hubby, kids and I started walking toward the theater, and my husband noticed my face and asked, “What is wrong?!” I guess I looked a bit upset.
The girls were behind me so I quite loudly pronounced, “Those bitches behind me are what is wrong!”
I heard a gasp from behind and a low voice, “Did she just call us bitches?”
I turned and glared, daring them to say something. I was so angry, I almost wanted them to.
They didn’t meet my eye, but stared down at the ground, and went quickly to their movie.
When we got into the theater though my anger dissipated and I felt like such a loser. I knew it was irrational, that their opinion truly does not matter, but none of that rationalizing does a bit of good in the moment. I silently sobbed for the first ten minutes of the movie.
Every taunt from school, every comment, every side-look I have endured came rushing back.
I hate that feeling. I hate even more that those twits could bring me to that stage.
I have lost 11 pounds so far this month. I am working out for several hours every week. Moreover, I am an awesome mother, wife, teacher, friend, sister, and I’ll be damned if I waste another minute thinking about that scene.
Those girls can kiss my fat ass.
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Posted in bad days, blogging | 3 Comments

>Rocking Week

>This week has been intense. I have worked out four out of five days, 45 minutes or more each (12 workouts so far this month). I also started the P90X regime on Tuesday (if you follow my Twitter, you’ve heard allll about it :D)

My eating is incredible. I’ve been keeping it right at 1600-1700 calories, eating tons of fruit and vegetables and protein.
I feel *amazing.* I am sleeping SO much better. My walking time has significantly increased. It’s only been 2 weeks but I am already seeing and feeling changes in my body-specifically my booty! (That thing is tight-holla)
Two worrisome things loom: tomorrow night is my best friends sons’ birthday party. Pizza, popcorn, cupcakes-lotsa trigger foods. It makes me nervous.
Saturday night is a work fundraiser I have to go to-some sort of BBQ buffet. Of course, that means high fat meats, rolls, ‘salads’ whose main ingredient is mayonnaise.
As far as tomorrow, I will be tweeting from the party- hopefully some accountability will keep me on my plan.
Right now the floodgates of heaven are opening up-a real Texas storm. I hope everyone stays safe and dry tonight.
Talk to y’all tomorrow!
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>Down 7 pounds!

>I have lost 7.6 pounds so far this month!!

Stats:
I have eaten approximately 2155 calories per day, I have exercised for 308 total minutes (~44min/day), and burned off ~3620 calories.

The changes I am feeling are incredible. I am sleeping better, feeling more energetic, and in just 9 workouts I can already walk longer and faster.

Yesterday I did the entire P90X Shoulders & Arms workout PLUS Zumba PLUS yardwork PLUS a mile and a half walk! Who is this person?!

Please excuse the exclamation point overload-I’m pretty excited 😀

It’s Sunday morning and I’ve been up since 6:30. I slept wonderfully and woke up sans alarm. My first order was a 2 mile, 45 minute walk. It was gorgeous.

Now I am off to breakfast, church and some shopping this afternoon.Y’all have an awesome day!

Posted in feeling groovy, happy happy joy joy, weigh in, working out | 1 Comment

>TGIF

>
It is April 8th and I have worked out 7 times this month! Halla-frickin-lujah. I think I am off to a really great start.

My husband is now on the weight loss bandwagon and it has been an EYE opening experience. He can’t believe the calorie counts for things. The first few days he was so gripey-“That’s not even enough cereal for a toddler!” “Who counts cookies? Just eat ’em!” 😛 Now that he realizes how bad most restaurant food is, for example, he is MORE than happy to eat in. Woohoo!

Yesterday was the day from hell. I had so many encounters with rude students-one student (with a decidedly failing average I might add) accused me of “wasting class time” when I answered my class phone. WTH?! And he was one of many such encounters yesterday. By lunch I was so fed up I just stayed in my room and bawled. I am SO very ready for his group to be gone. I feel horrible saying that, but I am ready for a break!

Anywhosville, I came home yesterday exhausted and decided to just chill. With wine. Lots of wine.

Today was much better. I even resisted the siren call of Mexican takeout at lunch and stuck with my lunch my husband packed. (Have I told y’all my husband makes me breakfast and lunch everyday? He is absolutely the sweetest man on Earth.) I didn’t even really want it. All that grease and salt-bleh.

I am SO glad it is spring. Strawberries, squash, okra, nectarines-so yummy!

Now I am going to watch Star Wars Episode 6 with my snuggle-bunnies and probably reenact some epic light saber battles. Be jealous. Be very jealous.

May the Force be with you-
Val

Posted in feeling groovy, happy happy joy joy, working out | 1 Comment

>Helluva Start

>Calories: 1796
Exercise: 65 minutes

I woke up at 5:15 to workout only to be greeted by a good ol’ thunderstorm. So I snuggled in bed for 45 minutes 😀

Todays was dreaded state testing. I wish I had a pedometer. I probably walked 2 miles, just making laps around the room.

Tonight I walked for 40 minutes and did 25 minutes of P90X Arms/Shoulders and some ab work.. . and my arms feel like jelly!

Time to hit the shower and bed. Hopefully my workout won’t be interrupted by anymore spring showers.

Posted in good days, success, working out | Leave a comment

>Happy April

>On a non-weight related note, it’s a shitty time to be a teacher in Tejas. My best friend, who I’ve worked with for three years, was told yesterday her contract wouldn’t be renewed. The politics and bullshit behind the budget cuts in education baffle and enrage me. And to be fired on April Fools? REALLY? Ugh.

Anywhoosville, I’m happy to report I’m feeling distinctly better than I was a couple of days ago. My husband and I made a $100 bet to see who can exercise/track calories int eh month of April. I am veeeeery competitive so this is just the thing to get my juices flowing!

Yesterday I walked 1.75 miles. Today I walked the same and then did 35 minutes of weight training and then abs and stretching. I have come in under calories both days as well.

The hubby and I were supposed to go tonight with my friends, but we opted out. I told Hman it’s been too many weekends in a row that we have gone drinking. We don’t necessarily get drunk, but it’s still a risky behavior, especially since we are both children of alcoholics.

Also, whenever we drink I make *bad* food decisions and stay up waaaaay too late. Like 4am late. It throws off my sleep schedule for days afterward. Not worth it.

Instead we took the kids to see Hop, grilled dinner, and played Mario World. Now the kids are heading to bed and it’s time for the hubs and I to settle in for a movie.

Posted in eating, feeling groovy, working out | Leave a comment

>I Broke My Give-A-Damn

>So I’ve been tracking like a good little fat girl, and packing my lunch, and saying no to soda.

I start everyday with a good breakfast, am eating more fruit and reducing portions.

But I

Can

Not

Get

My Exercise

Mojo

Working.

And I *know* I’m losing fitness daily. I come home from work, change into workout clothes, and never make it out the door. I could wallpaper my living room with the excuses I put up, but that’d be depressing.

My mental tape has been really negative lately. I’ve been kind of depressive and moody.

Every time I look in the mirror I hear my mental tirade-you’re fat. You’ll never be thin. Why even try to lose weight? You’ll still be hideous.

Ugly.

Ugly.

UGLY.

I just feel like I’ve been doing this for-fricking-ever and I have literally gotten NOWHERE. I know what I *need* to do-why don’t I do it?!

Posted in bad days, failure | Leave a comment